picture description

this post is meant to be fictional, funny and cock.

so if you see this symbol: (*), you must laugh, cos its meant to be funny and cock.

today is english oral examination.

we have two private candidates.

1st candidate: (*)

2nd candidate: (*)

and the examiner is:

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(*************************************) [this one must laugh very loud and laugh very long]

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examiner to 1st candidate: 好，你可以开始了。(*)

1st candidate: HUH?! 现在是考口试 MEH?! 不是 english oral MEH?! (**)

examiner: oh sorry sorry. yes its english oral. describe to me the picture as detailed as you can. (**)

1st candidate:

inside this picture got two pple. the one on the left is a super gan phua YANDAO prince. (*) the costume that he is wearing is super gan phua NICE. (*) but the costume is not grand enough, only by wearing a 龙袍 can then bring out the full yandao-ness and grand-ness of the prince. (*)

the girl on the left resembles someone. i think she looks like tao-jie from little nyonya. so this girl shouldnt wear the qing princess costume. doesnt suit her image. i think she looks better in ma-jie costume. (*)

and i suddenly realised that the super gan phua YANDAO prince looks like robert zhang from little nyonya. so robert zhang is demanding tao-jie to bring him to yuzhu. but tao-jie dun want, cos she wants to protect yuzhu. so robert bo bian, and have to resort to flirting with tao-jie in order to find the whereabouts of yuzhu. tao-jie buay tahan robert flirting with her, so she give a very painful expression. (***)

examiner: -.-''' ...................................................

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a very distraught examiner to 2nd candidate: you can begin now.

2nd candidate:

this picture shows a group of pple dressed in qing dynasty costumes. the qing girls are very pretty, especially the one second from the right. her smile is very sweet. (*) the guys are dashing, but not as outstanding as the girls. the guy on the extreme left look like one of my friends. that friend's name is called wai-wai, so let me name this guy as ZZ. (*) ok my friend wai-wai has a very interesting blog, but his blog style is always the same. it always starts with a simple description of his daily activities, the places he went to, then he will show the pics. (*) he seldom blog about feelings. so when i blog, i shall try not to blog the same style as him. and yah, i think ZZ is very fat, cos his whole body covers the poor guy next to him. (*)

i think this group of pple has just finished a dance performance at asian civilisations museum. they must have performed very well, so members of the audience wants to take pictures with them. they are like celebrities. but i think they dun want to become celebrities. alot of pple want to take pictures with them, and they feel obliged to take with these pple, but its very tiring. that's why celebrities' managers always have to help celebrities chase away the fans. (*)

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grades given to the 2 candidates by the examiner. upon 10.

1st candidate: 8/10

2nd candidate: 9/10

2nd candidate scores higher because she looks more innocent. (*)

the emperors of qing dynasty

make a guess.

kang xi? qian long? yong zheng?

who is who?

wo/od performance pics

pictures of me in action. or in stationary poses.

thank you pro photographers for the nice pics!

dinner at esplanade glutton's bay (again)

the second time there in two weeks.

so must order different food.

chicken murtabak ($6)

kaya fondue, comes together with tea or coffee ($3.70) ; dun be deceived by the plain appearance. the bread sticks are toasted to a perfect crisp. dipping the bread sticks inside kaya and butter and then putting them in your mouth is damn ORGASMIC. that is if you like sweet stuff.

satay (dunno the price cos darling paid for it) ; the satay gravy taste damn shiok

bbq stingray (also dunno the price cos hw paid for it) ; a bit stingy with the sambal chilli. will taste so much better if more sambal chilli is added.

introducing the gluttons:

you noe why i appear twice? because i am more glutton than the other two. haha.

saturday post

some photos to share from my camera phone.

very nice lagsane (i think i spell wrongly haha). cost 7 bucks. the stall is at a coffee shop near jurong east mrt. i went there to eat lunch last sat while waiting for the rest to come before going to sci centre.

yummy papaya dessert that my dad made. my dad is good at cooking nice dishes and making nice desserts.

my new car.

(just kidding. haha.)

trying out new clothes at the adidas outlet at jp2. is one whole set (top and bottom). cost me 59 bucks. how come there's someone's head outside the door?!

went back to hall to pack some of my stuff to shift home. i am moving out of hall on 7th april. darling accompanied me. after packing the stuff i brought darling to this nice eatery near ntu for supper. is actually a coffee shop lah. but its a more atas coffee shop, cos got more stalls compared to a normal coffee shop. the food there is very nice. and the drinks stall sell wine in addition to beer. confirm atas.

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oh a member of the public uploaded the photos of our acm performance. he is very very fast.

so ms tan, dun take your own sour time in uploading your photos ok? haha.

acm performance

all of you are welcome to go asian civilisation museum on 28th and 29th march to enjoy a series of fun-filled activities! admission is FREE! and of course to support the NUSCD performance. btw we are performing 4 slots, 1245, 1345, 1515 and 1615. dance until we die.

concubines queuing up in line to be chosen by the emperor. haha.

40,000th visitor!

DEAR ALL, I AM PROUD TO ANNOUNCE TO ALL OF YOU...

THE 40,000th VISITOR of 歪歪贴米歪.................... (drums rolling)

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TA DA!!!!!!!!!!!! she is called sj, and i knew her in hall.

i noe quite alot of hall pple read my blog, but knowing that she reads my blog came quite a surprise. she said that my blog is very entertaining to read. i am happy to hear that from her. :)

oh, and i will also like to honour her. actually, all the while i thought my first dance partner is chio outdoor enthusiast. but later on i realised is actually zm, when we were dance partners for a short duration in 我的家园. and then now, i realised that my first first ever dance partner is actually her! i lifted her in float 2006. haha.

oh, and not to forget the image that she sent me:

and let me reminicise the days of me when i was thin and have six pack. haha.

fit, handsome and studious-looking, yes?

40,001th visitor!

dear all, i present to you, the poor guy that miss out 40,000 mark by just a wee tiny bit.

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mr nzj, my dance mate. the items that we performed together are: 我的家园, winter solstice and distance. the above picture came from the item Distance, showcased in Psyche, a NUSCD production last year for NUS Arts Festival. Watch the video at youtube on your own.

i shall give you a soft copy of another pic as consolation. up to you whether you want to save it. HAHA.

floating 包

saw something magical.

40,009!!!

Sunday 22nd March 2009 1:42 pm - number of blog visits hit 40,009!!!

so who is the 40,000th visitor?

pls stand up and identify yourself, to win the attractive prize below:

magic show @ science centre

here comes my usual style of blogging again. haha.

went to science centre with darling, hw, hz and fen to watch zn's father perform magic. there is this magic exhibition being held at the science centre, so zn's father is the magician being invited to perform, and zn got free tickets from her father, so she gave them to us.

in the past i always thought that magic is a super 奇妙 thing, but ever since i watch that movie about magic (which i forgot the title), starring hugh jackman and christian bale, i realised magic is actually all about science, illusion and some form of intelligence used to trick audience. so whenever i watch magic shows (for example the magicians on 综艺大哥大), i try to look out for the "loopholes" that made the magic trick successful, but most of the time i failed. :p

the magic show by zn's father was nice! he has very good 互动 with the audience, especially the kids. and he showed us some "loopholes" of those magic tricks, which are damn funny. but his other tricks are quite amazing, for example he show us a big book, where initially all the pages are empty, then he press something on the cover of the book, the pictures on the pages appear, then he press something on the cover again, the colors of the pictures appear, then he press one more time, the pages become empty again.

after his show we went to approach him, and i called him mr tan, and he look a bit stunned. hahaha his expression was priceless. then we asked him whether he got see us before, and he said he find me familiar! wow! i thought he will find fen familiar, not me. haha.

so we took a picture with him, and then he showed some more magic tricks to us. he put his hand behind darling's ear and a red ball appeared in his hand. then he transform the red ball into two balls, put one ball in his hand, one ball in hz's hand. then he closed his hand, asked hz to do the same, and he said he will teleport the ball in his hand to hz's hand, and true enough when hz opened her hand there are two balls! and no more ball in his hand! next he took the two balls from hz and put them in darling's hand, then ask darling to close her hand, and when she open her hand, there are now three balls!

making a rope horizontal. making a cup float in the air. and the uncle in the middle is the magician aka zn's father.

after saying goodbye to him, we went to tour the rest of science centre, but we din manage to tour finish all the exhibition halls, because the closing time is approaching. the exhibits were very interesting and cool, and of course, we took alot of pics.

so here are the pics. (yes my usual style of blogging)

dancers must always take jump shots. haha.

we left the science centre, and each of us went to different places. darling went to hall to find her hall friends. hz and fen went to ucc to watch the dance ensemble performance, but they din get tickets cos tickets are given on a first come first serve basis and there were too many pple in front of them queueing. hw and i went back home. hw was quite shag because the previous night he talk cock with the hall pple until 5 am this morning. crazy guy.

so after eating dinner at home, i bought supper (prawn omelette and frog legs porridge) and drove to hall to meet darling, hz and fen again. this time round zn, clare and nzj joined us.

ok that's the end of my fun-filled saturday. :)

thank you ms tan zn for giving us the tickets! next time if your dad got anymore magic shows, be it local or overseas, for example las vegas, or pulau ubin, and if got free tickets, must give us ok!

*ITS REACHING 40,000 SOON! WHO WILL BE THE LUCKY WINNER OF MY AUTOGRAPHED PHOTO???