i was still sleeping and at 5 am my younger sister opened the door and woke me up, telling me that ah gong passed away. i was shocked and at that moment my mind went blank.
the next few days all of us were busy at his wake.
our duties include:
1) burning hell notes for my ah gong, and we must make sure the hell notes must be kept burning continuously throughout the whole duration of the wake.
2) cleaning up the whole wake area. we have alot of relatives and we basically used almost the whole void deck. we cleared tables, picked up litter, throw away trash bags filled with litter and replacing new trash bags, swept the floor, etc etc.
3) doing the "feeding" procedures for ah gong at specific meal time slots.
4) collecting the 白金 money and counting them at the end of each day, and we have to deposit them immediately in the atm cash deposit machine. we have to go to the cash deposit machine in at least a pair, because there's alot of money and we may be robbed, especially we are still in our wake attire.
5) doing PR with distant relatives (my father's cousins, uncles and aunts) who had not seen us for a very very very long time. so my sisters had been getting comments like: wahhhh dua3 han3 liao4! wahhhh 长的真漂亮！女大十八变！and i am getting comments like: 你是谁的儿子啊？wahhh 在街上一定认不出你。
6) last but not least, playing host to our friends and relatives who came to 守丧.
through this wake/funeral, i see my uncles, aunties and cousins everyday, and i think we were bonded much closer compared to before. i talked alot with my cousins on everything under the sun, such as school life, army life, soccer, etc etc.
yes, being involved in ah gong's wake is both physically and mentally draining, but the close relationship among us made it better and we tide through this together.
and now, it brings me to say this:
you do not need to wait for a relative to pass on and everyone started to become closer than before. you can start NOW when everyone is still around, and enjoy the family warmth together. if you had been busy with your work and had not been spending enough time with your family, why not put your work aside and just organise a family outing.
because even why the sky falls on your head, the first people to arrive to support you will always be your own family members.
rest in peace ah gong, i am sorry that i did not spend so much time with you during your later years.
you will remain in our heart and memories forever. :'(
the eight brothers! there is 9 actually. number 5 is not here. my dad is number 4.
ok nvm not funny. :p
eight brothers and two sisters taking with their chinese zodiac!
now you know why my family is so big, and why i have so many cousins. i will have a headache when i have my wedding banquet but i shall let my dad to the sitting arrangement for the relatives. :p
yes, being involved in ah gong's wake is both physically and mentally draining, but the close relationship among us made it better and we tide through this together.
and now, it brings me to say this:
you do not need to wait for a relative to pass on and everyone started to become closer than before. you can start NOW when everyone is still around, and enjoy the family warmth together. if you had been busy with your work and had not been spending enough time with your family, why not put your work aside and just organise a family outing.
because even why the sky falls on your head, the first people to arrive to support you will always be your own family members.
rest in peace ah gong, i am sorry that i did not spend so much time with you during your later years.
you will remain in our heart and memories forever. :'(
now you know why my family is so big, and why i have so many cousins. i will have a headache when i have my wedding banquet but i shall let my dad to the sitting arrangement for the relatives. :p
